That thing called LDR

I admit that I'm not an expert relationship guru though some seek my advice and help with regard to this matter. Well, I'm NBSB by choice though most people can't believe it whenever I told them. Being raised traditionally had contributed to my commitment and dream that I would only enter in a relationship if I found the guy that I would settled for good but I understand it was way hard.

I was exposed to several romantic relationships because of my lifestyle and broad networks which taught me a lot of valuable lessons. From social work that showed me the different family struggles, to my in a relationship, engaged, married, separated and divorced friends and so on. Frankly, some of these situations had traumatized and terrified me at first because I felt I was too immature for the situation but later on I had realized it's silverlinings. 

Lately, I'm getting deeper appreciation of "Long Distance Relationship". Beyond the beautiful stories of my several friends and a lot of people underlies unsourmountable courage and great sacrifice. I was such a coward to think that LDR doesn't require so much effort and adjustment. I thought I can still continue being an independent woman and do whatever I want knowing that the partner was faraway. Hell no, it was way TOO HARD!!! I was somehow used to getting pursued often and I was still a little selfish when it happend which turned my world upside down when I had a dose of my own medicine. The time difference which brought sleep deprivation either for one or both, the frustrations of physical presence, financial stability to be able to meet each other often (ideal is every 3 months), always trust your partner while you're miles apart mos of the time, healthy communication to show each other's love and strengthen rapport, patience, humility and many more. It was such a high maintenance. 

When I've  attended the wedding of a close friend who brave out LDR for several years. I was totally impressed with his unwavering efforts to make it work. Both of them actually. I'm not being biased because he's my friend. Lol I'm controlling my tears the entire day because the couple were already crying most of the time. It was truly heartfelt and solemn. Also, it was the first wedding proposal that we've organize so it means a lot for our group of friends. I don't wanna discuss the funny details but it affirmed our strong love for our friendship. (Totally blessed to have these amazing people!!!). I'm totally in awe that day! Me and my guy bestie had endless discussion about it on our way home. (Thanks to him and his wife for always letting me do third-wheeling!!!) It dawned on me that I wasn't prepared and ready for it. I wasn't brave enough to fight for it maybe because there was also uncertainty or my mind is still a bit hazy from so many things. Being on my own majority of my life then suddenly having someone was such a big adjustment plus the differences. Witnessing how my friends brave out LDR and their happily ever after journey had inspired me a lot. I wanted to be like them if ever I'll be into LDR again. I'll be more committed, take more risks and give my best.